I had been in bed for all of 10 minutes when I came to the conclusion I wasn't tired enough to fall asleep. So I thought I'd write in here.
I was actually thinking about deleting my Facebook all together - just to try something different. Something has got to be said about the fact that you can keep completely up to date with someone's entire life and never speak a word to them about it. Isn't that just a little bit... creepy?
Well, not even creepy. How interesting would the conversation be if you were to ever catch up with them? You come right out and let them know you're already pretty up to date with what is going on or do you pretend to act surprised and interested when they tell you their three year old's name, birthday, favourite food, favourite toy and the cute way they pronounce everyone's names?
Anyways, I am going to get rid of it I think.
What I did want to write about was something that happened the other day at work. One of the women I work with in the design room, announced on Wednesday that she was 4 months pregnant. This usually doesn't tend to be a huge deal to anyone outside of the immediate circle of family and friends but this pregnancy is so much more and such a big deal.
This woman, had decided early last year that there was a chance that at 40 and single that she may miss out on something she knew was very important to her - starting a family. So, after a lot of soul searching, asking lots of questions and finding answers, she decided that she would venture down the road of IVF and have a baby - by herself.
Now, every now and then it comes up in the news that there are women in Australia who decide to become mothers without the presence of a partner. Rarely do you hear about someone who's made that decision - but I think the general arguments for 'for' and 'against' get raised when certain parts of society get their knickers in a knot over the fact that women are wanting more control over how their lives plan out, which includes putting of childbirth for careers or travel, before finding ways to push the boundaries of nature and have babies into their late 30s and 40s.
This topic had come up between myself, this woman (let's call her L, because calling her woman all the time is getting a bit old) and another woman, T - we all work quite closely together. Do you wait around for the husband to have the baby? What if the husband doesn't come along? What then? So be it or do we try something else?
My viewpoint was that, life today sometimes does not work out to be the fairy tale ending all the time. And reality is boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands and partners sometimes come, and they sometimes go. Things change. You cannot predict the future. You also cannot map out a perfect little life with husband, dog, 2.3 children and a white picket fence. Life is not that neat and tidy. On the assumption I was emotionally and financially secure to bring a child into the world, I would do it. With or without someone who I called my partner because that was something I think I would want more than anything else in the world - to have a family. Selfish? Probably. I think that's one of the main arguments against it. But how is it different from you and your husband wanting a family? You and your wife? Your girlfriend or boyfriend? Anyways, both myself and L agreed that it was a viable option. T was a little more optimistic about finding the other half, but could see the reasoning behind going through with it.
Well, L... kept secret her little secret that she was doing just that. Not wishing, wondering. She decided to do it. She knew she'd be on her deathbed regretting the fact she didn't even try.
What I am so floored with about this is the courage and the fact that she stands out from the millions of people who never end up doing what they want to do... what they dream to do. No more, 'I wish...' but 'I'm going to try.' How many people do you really know who went for what they believe in? I mean, REALLY believe in? I think it's quite rare. People make excuses all the time for not doing it and it's now normal. L could have made up a million reasons why she shouldn't have done it... money, faith, time, age... L is also of the Catholic faith, and so is her family. So that would most likely be something else she has to contend with is traditions, but I think she's strong enough to know what's best for her and leave the traditions to others.
Anyways, very proud of her. Very happy she's reminded me that there is more to life than work. And to also remember to think about what's really important to me, rather than everyone else.