I have been so tired lately because my TSH level has been up quite considerably. A 'normal' TSH lab result is between (roughly) 1 - 4.5, depending on the lab. My 'normal' range, meaning I can get out of the bed in the morning is anywhere between 0.1 and 1.5. At the moment it's 2.33 and I feel like a zombie. I need to increase my T4 dose to level it out. 

I just recently sat down and went through a pile of letters received during high school. This one particular pile belonged to the hubby. Remarkably, I was able to intercept during a clean out (they were headed straight for the bin) and now I have them sorted and stored in my wardrobe.

It sounds really stupid, but I cannot stand the thought of those letters being tossed. I myself still have all letters received during high school, safely stored at my parents house. I wish I was able to save the emails I received as well.

These letters are almost a journal. Between friends and ex-boyfriends they basically map out 2002-2005. Most memories are completely lost, but reading those letters always reminds me of my time growing up. The drama, the secrets, the confessions. Hating parents and school, sneaking around. Reading some of the letters written to hubby during high school was a bit of a shock. Let me tell you, compared to the girls I knew I was naive and completely innocent. Some of the letters made me feel like a nun. 

I especially love reading the ones I wrote. There are some I had written to hubby, and I am trying to decide whether I ask an ex-boyfriend (whom wrote me novels, and vise-versa) whether I can read any he has kept. They're almost like a diary (some written in code, but I figure it out eventually). Old memories and feelings. It reminds me what I was like when I was 16.

Again, I wish I had some of the emails. It was just catching on in our last years of high school (NOTHING like it is now, let me assure you - the main forms of communication were still telephone, hand written letters and face to face as texting was too expensive and email was unfamiliar). 

One of the girls who I frequently exchanged letters with recently told me she's pregnant. Not a shock, seeing as she's been a Mrs for over a year now and we're in our mid 20s (officially 'late' 20s after this year). For some reason, even though I know plenty of people who have had babies her pregnancy was the most shocking. Our lives were different before, but now she's really grown up.

I still feel like I'm 17 to a degree. I think because I still feel like I'm in limbo a bit. I am yet to feel completely settled. I never felt like I belonged in Sydney, so I sort of feel like I still have to be somewhere else before I grow up entirely. I know I won't be a designer forever - I can safely say I will end up teaching, most likely high school. I still feel like I'm in between somewhere I was and need to be. 

I am watching a documentary about the children who were affected by the tsunami in Japan last year - one year ago today. It's quite interesting. The kids being interviewed are quite cottoned on to the situation, even the young ones. One mother mentions that her young daughter keeps asking her if she will be able to have children, or how many children she will be able to have (they were near the power plant).

A single father measures the radiation outside before he lets his daughter out to play. Usually no longer than 30 minutes at a time. He purchased a radiation detector from the Ukraine. A poor woman found her daughter's body as it floated back to land from the ocean after the authorities scaled back a search for missing children. Now all the kids say they want jobs saving people from disasters. Scientists, inventors, experts in radiation, earthquakes and tsunami.

I am really torn between the outsourcing vs keeping work in Australia argument. I hear about it a lot as my industry is split between the two (especially with the introduction of crowd sourcing) and have been thinking about it quite a lot over the past couple of days.

This is what I eat for breakfast. Usually it's a bit more, but I'm on portion control for a couple of weeks before a friend's wedding. I set the microwave on fire this morning cooking sweet potato. I have never, ever done that before. We got a new microwave a while back and I think I am still getting used to the awesome cooking power it contains. It scared the hell out of me. I haven't had such an adrenaline rush in a long time. 

Here is 14g protein (chicken breast), 18g carbs (tomato and carrot) and 3g fat (avocado). Fits on a bread and butter plate.